WEBVTT 00:00:00.350 --> 00:00:01.923 Tell me this: 00:00:02.080 --> 00:00:05.406 what's the hardest part to get right about managing others? 00:00:05.470 --> 00:00:06.770 Mm... 00:00:06.812 --> 00:00:08.120 I have no idea. 00:00:08.171 --> 00:00:10.840 That's why I'm watching this video. 00:00:10.952 --> 00:00:16.112 For many, the hardest thing to do is to communicate effectively, 00:00:16.252 --> 00:00:19.658 and not just the talking part, but the listening part too. 00:00:19.783 --> 00:00:22.174 I totally understand that. 00:00:22.430 --> 00:00:25.658 But... but what scares me the most is... 00:00:25.780 --> 00:00:28.823 what if I have to come down on somebody who's my friend? 00:00:28.960 --> 00:00:31.589 I don't know how I could ever do that. 00:00:31.745 --> 00:00:33.510 Having to communicate with friends 00:00:33.521 --> 00:00:36.480 can certainly be a legitimate concern. 00:00:36.612 --> 00:00:38.867 So let's take another look at a manager 00:00:38.878 --> 00:00:41.112 who had that very same concern. 00:00:41.151 --> 00:00:42.159 Ooh,... 00:00:42.169 --> 00:00:44.237 this should be interesting. 00:00:44.350 --> 00:00:49.207 This manager understands that clear boundaries are essential, 00:00:49.238 --> 00:00:51.650 and now he must overcome a situation. 00:00:51.707 --> 00:00:55.207 Let's see how this manager does with communicating to an employee 00:00:55.218 --> 00:00:58.557 that has gone outside of the boundaries. 00:00:58.713 --> 00:01:00.791 Hey, Pete, you got a minute? 00:01:02.990 --> 00:01:06.768 Listen, there's been some chatter around that 00:01:06.779 --> 00:01:09.654 you've been coming in late, leaving early. 00:01:09.811 --> 00:01:12.092 Word is you're making that a regular thing. 00:01:12.217 --> 00:01:13.279 Is that true? 00:01:13.580 --> 00:01:16.132 Monty, man, have you forgotten how it is out there? 00:01:16.179 --> 00:01:18.520 If you ain't got something good to say, say it anyway. 00:01:18.554 --> 00:01:19.860 No, I haven't forgotten, 00:01:19.913 --> 00:01:22.643 which is why I'm asking you, is this true? 00:01:22.728 --> 00:01:24.103 I'm getting my work done, aren't I? 00:01:24.127 --> 00:01:25.439 Nobody's getting hurt. 00:01:25.490 --> 00:01:27.158 That's not the point. 00:01:27.370 --> 00:01:30.195 How would you feel if everyone else came in late and left early? 00:01:30.241 --> 00:01:31.712 You know that's happened plenty of times. 00:01:31.743 --> 00:01:34.116 Yeah, but not without prior permission. 00:01:34.240 --> 00:01:38.120 Hey, look, is there something going on that maybe I should know about? 00:01:38.530 --> 00:01:40.213 Nothing unusual. 00:01:40.300 --> 00:01:42.666 Come on, Monty. How long have we been working together? 00:01:42.728 --> 00:01:44.150 How long have we been friends? 00:01:44.197 --> 00:01:44.953 You know me. 00:01:44.963 --> 00:01:47.518 I get my work done on time, and I don't bother anybody. 00:01:47.556 --> 00:01:48.702 You can just let this slide. 00:01:48.729 --> 00:01:50.389 No! I can't. 00:01:50.960 --> 00:01:52.838 I need to know what's going on with you. 00:01:54.850 --> 00:01:56.830 I've been reffing some high school games. 00:01:56.877 --> 00:01:59.090 Sometimes it gets late before I'm done, 00:01:59.112 --> 00:02:00.820 or I have to be there early. 00:02:00.862 --> 00:02:03.393 It's no big deal. I'm just doing it for extra money. 00:02:03.476 --> 00:02:06.039 And there's nothing in the handbook that says I can't do off-hours work. 00:02:06.110 --> 00:02:07.132 I checked. 00:02:07.170 --> 00:02:08.230 Agreed. 00:02:08.240 --> 00:02:11.160 As long as it doesn't interfere with your work here, 00:02:11.170 --> 00:02:13.640 and it's starting to interfere. 00:02:13.755 --> 00:02:14.763 So, 00:02:14.905 --> 00:02:16.645 what are you gonna do to fix it? 00:02:16.970 --> 00:02:18.652 Well, I'm not gonna lose that gig. 00:02:18.746 --> 00:02:20.888 It's good money, and I really like. 00:02:20.934 --> 00:02:21.947 I get it. 00:02:22.013 --> 00:02:24.184 But do you really want to blow it here? 00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:27.887 Okay, I'll tell him I can't be there before six. 00:02:27.920 --> 00:02:30.490 Okay, that's good. That's a good start. 00:02:30.527 --> 00:02:31.541 What else? 00:02:32.840 --> 00:02:36.949 You know, this is going to be the only year this is probably gonna happen. 00:02:37.022 --> 00:02:39.950 With the new baby on the way, we just need some extra cash. 00:02:40.040 --> 00:02:42.350 Can't we just let this ride for the next few weeks? 00:02:42.387 --> 00:02:44.090 No, I can't do that. 00:02:44.460 --> 00:02:47.950 Pete, I can't risk a negative impact on the team, 00:02:47.960 --> 00:02:51.437 not to mention the potential safety issues involved. 00:02:51.615 --> 00:02:52.412 Fine. 00:02:52.453 --> 00:02:53.655 If it's running late, 00:02:53.700 --> 00:02:56.030 I'll just have to suck it up and be here on time. 00:02:56.050 --> 00:02:57.237 So, is that what you wanna hear? 00:02:57.269 --> 00:03:00.472 It's not about what I want to hear, Pete. I need to see it. 00:03:00.559 --> 00:03:04.246 I need to know you're gonna be here, rested and sharp. 00:03:05.918 --> 00:03:07.583 Now, you realize, according to policy, 00:03:07.594 --> 00:03:10.907 I'm gonna have to write you up and put that in your file. 00:03:11.173 --> 00:03:12.177 Fine. 00:03:12.204 --> 00:03:14.026 You gotta do what you gotta do. 00:03:15.220 --> 00:03:19.004 Oof! That was tough to watch. 00:03:19.070 --> 00:03:21.832 It sure wasn't easy for that manager. 00:03:21.910 --> 00:03:25.676 There were times when he just wanted to give in, you know? 00:03:25.754 --> 00:03:27.300 Let things slide. 00:03:27.362 --> 00:03:30.650 But that would have caused trouble later on. 00:03:30.690 --> 00:03:31.710 I get it. 00:03:31.737 --> 00:03:34.070 If he gave in, that would be the pattern. 00:03:34.080 --> 00:03:37.142 And then, of course, all sorts of other problems would pop up, 00:03:37.188 --> 00:03:41.267 like safety issues, deeper team resentment, and more. 00:03:41.342 --> 00:03:43.780 I'm confident you are getting the hang of 00:03:43.791 --> 00:03:46.598 what it takes to be a successful manager. 00:03:46.660 --> 00:03:49.204 Let them know what the expectations are, 00:03:49.215 --> 00:03:50.860 gather all the facts, 00:03:50.871 --> 00:03:52.450 ask the right questions, 00:03:52.460 --> 00:03:54.590 and then listen for the answers. 00:03:54.720 --> 00:03:56.840 That's communication. 00:03:56.950 --> 00:04:00.683 Oh, and always be sure to document your discussion. 00:04:00.746 --> 00:04:04.320 It will help you recall the solutions you both discussed, 00:04:04.330 --> 00:04:07.836 and your notes will also help if the situation leads to discipline 00:04:07.847 --> 00:04:09.259 or even termination. 00:04:09.331 --> 00:04:13.081 But it's a lot harder with people who are your friends. 00:04:13.315 --> 00:04:16.259 With friends it can be challenging, 00:04:16.271 --> 00:04:20.712 but you gain trust by standing your ground and being consistent. 00:04:20.830 --> 00:04:23.483 Doing favors for people just because they're your friends 00:04:23.494 --> 00:04:25.974 is about the worst thing you can do. 00:04:25.998 --> 00:04:28.154 You lose the trust of everybody else. 00:04:28.217 --> 00:04:32.280 And, honestly, true friends are not looking for special treatment. 00:04:32.389 --> 00:04:33.349 True.